Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Ms. Clinton vs The Great White Wail: Debate Run Up

As Jeb Bush et al discovered, it's not easy debating D.J. Trump. Most people enter debates thinking about making points which, when fact checked or analyzed by the chattering legions of post debate on camera faces, hold up.

Mr. Trump operates in an alternative universe--the solar system of the grade school play ground in which you answer your antagonist by braying, "Oh, you're so ugly."

Actually, even at the upper strata of intellect, this technique has been applied with effect:  Drunk at a dinner party, Winston Churchill was upbraided by a society doyen, in her diamond necklace and silk dress, looking down her nose at him, she intoned in her best upper class scandalized accent, "Sir, you are drunk!"
To which Churchill responded.  "Madame, you are correct. I am drunk. But in the the morning, I shall be sober and you shall still be ugly."

For the Donald, at the low end of the intellectual spectrum it was enough to simply deride Marco Rubio as being small of stature, or Jeb Bush as being "low energy." 

He'll look down at the diminutive Hillary Clinton and tell her she is short and fat, tired, worn out, menopausal and harboring some un named illness which disqualifies her.

Ms. Clinton, who has studied the preparation notebook for the debate and is ready to do her best court room analytics will have problems responding.

One hopes she is working not on the details contained in that 500 page notebook, but on counter punches to the jibes.

"Mr. Trump you pride yourself on an animal faculty, in which the chimpanzee is your equal and the jackass infinitely your superior."  (My favorite.)

"Mr. Trump, you mistake physical size for largeness of spirit: If ever there was a person who proved the two are not always connected, it must be you."

"Mr. Trump you mistake libido for valor.  You may excel at the former but you have shown no evidence of the latter." 

"Mr. Trump, I would rather be the wife of Bill Clinton than any of your--how many?--wives."

"Mr. Trump, you mistake a loud voice for a clear head."

"Mr. Trump, on what planet do you spend the majority of your time?"

"Mr. Trump in what alternative universe are you living--in which a wall can prevent illegal immigration and in which every Muslim is an enemy by virtue of their faith?"

"Mr. Trump you vilify Muslims and Hispanics as dangerous enemies not because of what they have done, but because of where they come from."

And all like that.

But what are the chances?


  1. Mad Dog,
    Love the line "Great White Wail"-clever and tremendously accurate, but Hillary would never open the debate with anything so daring. All of your suggestions for opening lines would work quite well..I was thinking she could also start with the old adage "The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has it's limits." Where it goes from there is the cliff hanger isn't it..I agree that hopefully Hill isn't wasting this run up time cramming more facts into her head. It's not necessary. If she spent the next three days without sleep and doing little more than watching re-runs of "The Flintstones" she'd still be infinitely more ready for the duel from an intellectual standpoint. But one really can't use intellectual and Trump in the same sentence can one. He never employed intellect when defeating his opponents, so Hill will need more in her arsenal than facts. The big, bad Donald will be huffing and puffing, but she needs to find a way to leave him as cowed as the female minister did last week. That was a sight to behold- he morphs from Candidate Trump into Baby Huey in one fell swoop. Here's to Hillary having some similar success, unfortunately she won't have the element of surprise, so it won't be as easy..

    Of course Donny may try to present the new and improved "Presidential" version of himself, but it seems unlikely he'd ever be able to maintain his composure for very long- the urge to bully and insult would be too hard to resist. When the time comes for a closing remark, it would be wonderful if Hillary was brief and to the point- as in-"You can't argue with stupidity". Alas, the chances of that are as likely as her comparing him-unfavorably-to a chimp and a jackass..darn..

  2. Maud,
    Now, if you could just get Hillary on the phone. From your lips to Hillary's ears.
    The thing is, Mr. Trump sets the rules for the debate, for what people consider a win.
    Actually, I expect he'll come out quietly and dance around the ring, looking to get all wild with a flurry of quotable for TV soundbites toward the end.
    All he has to do is to look not crazy, just as all George W had to do was to look not flat out imbecilic.
    His set pieces will likely remain as they have been, "Oh, there'll be so much winning after so much losing."
    Remember Obama getting taken down by Romney the first debate?
    It was only when he realized he might be in trouble, Obama came out swinging in the second debate, but it was pretty demoralizing for a while after that first debate.
    Hillary will no doubt be timid, playing it safe, not a lot of zingers.
    Bernie, of course would demolish Trump, because he has that capacity to simplify and hammer.
    Alas, Hillary does not.