Sunday, December 11, 2016

Trump's Landslide

I heard Donald Trump on the radio today. He said he won a landslide victory.

He said even Bill Clinton voted for him.
He said he heard illegal Mexicans and even some legal ones have been packing up to leave the country before January 20th.
Even more good news:  Radical Islamists have started committing suicide.
Visa requests from Muslims hoping to enter the country have fallen by 150%.
Muslims have been taking off by hot air balloons from rooftops in New Jersey, headed for Canada. Donald saw that himself.
And he just negotiated with U.S. Steel and Carrier and General Motors to bring back 2 million jobs to American factories. 
The old jobs, not the new ones running robots.
And the coal miners are are going back to work to mine clean coal which will actually cleanse the air and reduce CO2 emissions as power plants burn it. And the polar ice caps are reforming just hearing that news. 
Polar bears are celebrating. Really great parties up there in the Arctic. 
And driveless cars will not be allowed on interstate highways because that would throw cab drivers out of work. 
And good news for infants everywhere: No more vaccinations, which the Donald heard causes mental retardation.
Obamacare is dead. But Blue Cross/ Blue Shield is going to insure everyone for really great prices. It'll be great. Everyone's a winner.

Also he's replacing Comey at the FBI with Hillary Clinton, in a gesture of magnanimity but don't worry about Comey, who will head the Miss Universe pageant and will be a consultant to "Celebrity Apprentice."
And Maria Bartiromo is going to host a Christmas pageant on the new Trump Channel, and she's going to wear that great red dress with those gold earrings.
 Everyone's a winner. 
Wow! This is going to be a great Christmas, after all. 
Wonder what he's got in store for New Year's?


  1. Yes Mad Dog, there is a Santa Claus...His name is Donald J. Trump. Why I was reeling with delight at your long list of miraculous miracles he has in store for us...Be still my heart..Wow...

    Now I don't mean to spoil the surprise my friend, but you did say you wanted to know what he has planned for all of us on New Year's and I've looked into it for you..Let's just say all the naysayers and whiners bellyaching about his killing Obamacare can give it a rest cause our President elect has something really big planned..HUGE..He doesn't just plan on insuring all Americans with top shelf plans-he-now hold on to you hat Mad Dog-he intends to end disease. That's right and not just some diseases, ALL diseases... Talk about lowering the cost of healthcare-why we ain't seen nothin yet..

    Of course there's concern that this may unfortunately leave a lot of folks currently working in the health care field unemployed-part of the cost of progress and making America great again..How do you think you'd be at operating a forklift?

  2. M,
    Don't you worry about me being put out of work when the Donald ends disease. I'm sure he'll have some really, really great job for me to replace my current gig.
    Just like the folks at the Carrier plant, he won't let me down.
    Mad Dog