I heard Donald Trump on the radio today. He said he won a landslide victory.
He said even Bill Clinton voted for him.
He said he heard illegal Mexicans and even some legal ones have been packing up to leave the country before January 20th.
Even more good news: Radical Islamists have started committing suicide.
Visa requests from Muslims hoping to enter the country have fallen by 150%.
Muslims have been taking off by hot air balloons from rooftops in New Jersey, headed for Canada. Donald saw that himself.
And he just negotiated with U.S. Steel and Carrier and General Motors to bring back 2 million jobs to American factories.
The old jobs, not the new ones running robots.
And the coal miners are are going back to work to mine clean coal which will actually cleanse the air and reduce CO2 emissions as power plants burn it. And the polar ice caps are reforming just hearing that news.
Polar bears are celebrating. Really great parties up there in the Arctic.
And driveless cars will not be allowed on interstate highways because that would throw cab drivers out of work.
And good news for infants everywhere: No more vaccinations, which the Donald heard causes mental retardation.
Obamacare is dead. But Blue Cross/ Blue Shield is going to insure everyone for really great prices. It'll be great. Everyone's a winner.
Also he's replacing Comey at the FBI with Hillary Clinton, in a gesture of magnanimity but don't worry about Comey, who will head the Miss Universe pageant and will be a consultant to "Celebrity Apprentice."
And Maria Bartiromo is going to host a Christmas pageant on the new Trump Channel, and she's going to wear that great red dress with those gold earrings.
Everyone's a winner.
Wow! This is going to be a great Christmas, after all.
Wonder what he's got in store for New Year's?
He said even Bill Clinton voted for him.
He said he heard illegal Mexicans and even some legal ones have been packing up to leave the country before January 20th.
Even more good news: Radical Islamists have started committing suicide.
Visa requests from Muslims hoping to enter the country have fallen by 150%.
Muslims have been taking off by hot air balloons from rooftops in New Jersey, headed for Canada. Donald saw that himself.
And he just negotiated with U.S. Steel and Carrier and General Motors to bring back 2 million jobs to American factories.
The old jobs, not the new ones running robots.
And the coal miners are are going back to work to mine clean coal which will actually cleanse the air and reduce CO2 emissions as power plants burn it. And the polar ice caps are reforming just hearing that news.
Polar bears are celebrating. Really great parties up there in the Arctic.
And driveless cars will not be allowed on interstate highways because that would throw cab drivers out of work.
And good news for infants everywhere: No more vaccinations, which the Donald heard causes mental retardation.
Obamacare is dead. But Blue Cross/ Blue Shield is going to insure everyone for really great prices. It'll be great. Everyone's a winner.
Also he's replacing Comey at the FBI with Hillary Clinton, in a gesture of magnanimity but don't worry about Comey, who will head the Miss Universe pageant and will be a consultant to "Celebrity Apprentice."
And Maria Bartiromo is going to host a Christmas pageant on the new Trump Channel, and she's going to wear that great red dress with those gold earrings.
Everyone's a winner.
Wow! This is going to be a great Christmas, after all.
Wonder what he's got in store for New Year's?


























