When Donald Trump was beating the drum about his own "investigation" of Barack Obama's birth certificate, he said, "Oh, you'd be surprised the things we are finding."
Of course, we were not surprised, because they were finding absolutely nothing.
Obama responded at the Washington Correspondents' Dinner by playing the scene from the Lion King showing the birth of the new young lion king being held aloft by a baboon, and saying this was even better than a birth certificate: This was his birth video.
Brought the house down.
If Mad Dog recalls correctly, Donald Trump was there as people laughed at him.
But now, we have, under the "you'd be surprised by the things we're finding" rubric this letter published by the Wall Street Journal, which Trump purportedly wrote to Epstein which got put into a birthday book for Epstein:
It takes the form of an imagined conversation between the two as imagined by Trump:
"There must be more to life than having everything.
Donald: Yes, there is, but I won't tell you what it is.
Jeffrey: Nor will I, since I also know what it is.
Donald: We have certain things in common,
Jeffrey.
Jeffrey: Yes, we do. Come to think of it.
Donald: Enigmas never age. Have you noticed that?
Jeffrey: As a matter of fact, it was clear to me the last time I saw you.
Donald: A pal is a wonderful thing. Happy birthday and may every day be another wonderful secret. "
So, is it just Mad Dog's ice age sensibility, or does this sound homoerotic? You are my wonderful secret, etc., etc.
Trump's public persona, in which he revels is a playboy who loves women and, as he says, particularly young women. He does not deny that. He promotes that. He's a womanizer who grabs women by the pussy. MAGATs love it. He's authentic!
One does wonder, Mad Dog admits, about men who "protest too much" about their own attraction to women.
It's that thing from "Avenue Q" about the puppet who everyone suspects is gay, because they never have seen him with a girl, but he sings about his girlfriend who nobody ever sees visit him, because she lives in Alberta, Canada.
"Her name is Alberta
She live in Vancouver
She cooks like my mother
And sucks like a Hoover.
I e-mail her every single day
Just to make sure that everything's okay.
It's a pity she lives so far away, in Canada!
Last week she was here, but she had the flu.
Too bad
'Cause I wanted to introduce her to you
It's so sad
There wasn't a thing that she could do
But stay in bed with her legs up over her head!
Oh!
I wish you could meet my girlfriend,
But you can't because she is in Canada.
I love her, I miss her, I can't wait to kiss her,
So soon I'll be off to Alberta!
I mean Vancouver!
Shit! Her name is Alberta, she lives in Vancou-"
So why should his association with Epstein be so vexing?
Nobody has called Trump a pederast, even though everyone calls Epstein that.
So, what is it about this letter that would make Trump sue the WSJ for a gazillion dollars?
Maybe Mad Dog's imagination is limited, but somehow he would not be surprised to see a headline on the National Enquirer tomorrow:
"TRUMP AND EPSTEIN SECRET LOVERS!!!!!!!"
"MELANIA SAYS: THEIR AFFAIR NEARLY WRECKED OUR MARRIAGE!!!!!"
But why would that be such a problem?
Being gay is no longer a problem in America, far as Mad Dog can see.
But among the uber masculine, testosterone driven crowd which comprises the MAGA world, maybe this would be a problem.
As Jonathan Capehart (who is gay) and David Brooks (who is not) remarked on the PBS News Hour (which Trump is defunding): Who cares about Epstein? We have vaccine denial, defunding weather services, ICE goon squads to talk about. But what is everyone talking about? Epstein!
Go figure.
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