Oh, All Better Now

 

Like all politicians caught in a public relations nightmare, Trump looks for a fall guy to blame  and so today it's Greg Bovino, the brickheaded yahoo from western North Carolina, who dresses up like a Seal Team Six macho man and thinks beating up women and children makes him a hero.

He's out of there. So Trump can say that wasn't me--that was Bovino set loose those hyenas.

Two Cheeks combined to make One Ass

All dolled up in his best Sam Brown belt, with stars on his collar and a really nifty olive uniform, Bovino told an incredulous press  that the real victims of the shooting of Alex Pretti by six Border Patrol federal agents were the agents.

The sounds of jaws dropping around the room were deafening, and even FOXNEWS struggled to explain how someone with 10 bullets in his back could have been victimizing Border Patrol agents.

Fortunately, they are getting pretty good in Minneapolis at camera capture, and from every angle, and there were many angles, Pretti is seen to be first trying to cover up a woman who had been slammed to the ground by Border Patrol, then brought to the ground by a tangle of hyena agents and then summarily executed, just the way these brainless losers all decked out in their warrior stuff wanted it to play out. They got their kill and they probably thought themselves heroes. Just like Call to Duty.

That Nurse Was A Domestic Terrorist and Deserved to Die!

Stephen Miller, of course, called Pretti a domestic terrorist, not wanting to await tedious examination of the videos--he just knew that nobody but a leftist, elitist, terrorist would be out there on the street. It was enough that Pretti was out on the street, which, by definition makes him a terrorist, but he was filming with his camera, which definitely defines him as someone trying to bring down the state by violence, and, get this, he was ARMED! Now why would you be carrying a gun, unless you were determined to shoot federal agents with it? Case closed!

I just Play One on TV
Am I HOT, or what?

Kristi Noem, of course, was dependably defending the murders because, you know: the GUN! Which is really rich, given her love affair with guns. But she really only uses guns to shoot puppies, which is what she encourages her DHS agents to get into. 

Czar Thomas the Terrible Trying to Think

But even Karoline Leavitt seemed to get that continuing to gaslight the White House Press Corps, even a corps which as been hand selected as MAGA approved press, is a tough  act, and so Trump decided he had to show he isn't always in favor of shooting innocent citizens, so he sends in another minimal neuron mope, Tom Homan, who carries the mystifying title of "Border Czar," which makes one wonder what Kristi Noem and Bordino are, but at least he's not either one of them.

Inspiring Confidence

And after years of saying he's going to rough up people who like immigrants and after recruiting a corps of young men with slogans like "Destroy the Flood" and "America for Americans" and "We'll Have Our Home Again!" Mr. Trump is just flabbergasted that his boys would shoot a nurse in the  back or a woman in an SUV.  Not the sort of chaos he had in mind, although he'll tell you there was chaos before he unleashed chaos and so there's that. 

Actual Domestic Terrorist: On His Orders

Meanwhile, rumor has it Minnesota National Guard have been deployed to protect citizens who might desire to protest. At first, we were told the Guard would just be guarding buildings, but now we see on TV a Guard soldier, not wearing a mask, but wearing a yellow visibility vest, drinking hot coco with random civilians. 

Serve and protect, indeed.

Dare Mad Dog ask, what happens when those Border Patrol, ICE federales show up toting their assault rifles, all decked out in armored vests and paratrooper boots, and they go for the next domestic terrorist nurse, or when they throw to the frozen ground another Minnesota mother?

Will the Minnesota National Guard guard the  good people of Minnesota against the Washington, DC shock troopers?

And what will that look like?